Winter Morning

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You glisten in the sun like a diamond,

the sun trapped in your golden strands

and you make me burn with inner fire.

You remind me of a sunny winter morn

the way you glitter and shine in the light

because you are beautiful and lonely.

You remind me of a winter morning

because you still take my breath away

and leave me gasping, seeking warmth.

You remind me of a cold winter morning,

your silence a cutting wind that slices

me to the core and douses my fire.

You remind me of a morning in the winter.

You are beautiful, and cold.

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We Create the World

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This is rare. Normally I write poem because they are significantly easier to conjure up and at the heart of it all I am a lazy writer. However, I am in the mood for something else and this blog is as good as any place to post it.

What I am about to say was triggered by me Facebook creeping on an old friend’s page and as the clicking continued, stumbling upon a profile picture of her in a bikini. After contemplating how much she’s changed from the young girl shamelessly exposing herself to the world of pretty messed up people to the relatively mature responsible lady she is today, I then started thinking about the meaning behind the bikini itself and realized that our reality is a cultural creation.

Now, I am not saying anything really ground breaking since most of this has already been discussed in various communications and psychology books. However, I am presenting this as a way of laying to rest something that has troubled me for a long time. This is a question I have posed many times to many different people and gotten the same response. Why is it OK for a woman to walk around in a bikini but not in bra and panties when the only difference as fast as I can see is an infinitesimal amount of fabric? The reason obviously is because WE, as a culture have normalized the bikini and privatized the bra and panties. The sheer amount of cultural manipulation is such that it affects us at a physiological level. Most men will get somewhat aroused if they encounter a woman in just bra and panties since the only time such an occurrence *typically* will happen is within a sexual setting. However, most men will ogle at woman in a bikini but exhibit less physiological reactions.

The point of all this is to graphically illustrate the power of our minds over the reality of our world. Not so much our individual minds but the group mind, and the organizations that dictate the workings of said mind. This cultural group mind is what advertiser use as a vehicle to attempt to drive their products home. And that is how the fashion industry convinced us that two identical seeming outfits were actually completely different simply because they said so.

What does all this matter one might ask, after all most intelligent/educated people know or understand this concept at a basic level. What does it matter? What matters is knowing that this entity, this group think, this matrix level overlord exists because this knowledge is power. Earlier I said we don’t really have much control over the realities that we all collectively perceive as an individual because that just wouldn’t be a feasible option. After all if I decided to start wearing my winter jacket to the shower and claiming that it’s not a winter jacket but in fact my shower suit most people would call me crazy. Crazy. That’s the exception, crazy people can potentially make huge changes to the over mind as individuals by simply doing the completely absurd. Obviously this is not a guaranteed occurrence, however all radical changes to our way of seeing the world around us were brought about by veritable madmen who we later re-dubbed as geniuses. After all crazy and gifted are often two sides of one coin, and with some individuals the difference is so negligible that it may as well not exist.

I have taken the long and windy pathway through this discussion by I want to end by simply saying that to make change happen, do the crazy! And pray because honestly genius is like 90 percent luck ūüėõ

Life is Hard

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I consume my sadness whole, trying to fill this hole

but this unholy bread will not satisfy, Devil’s cake

and so I swallow more and grind away my troubles.

I choke it down with the tears I refuse to shed

trying to drown the gnawing sensation in my gut.

My teeth rip into my misery and tear it up

into smaller bite sized portions and for a moment,

I can swallow past the lump in my throat.

But the mirror mirrors my madness and shows me

that I have only multiplied the rootless grief

and so I gorge myself on the forgotten memories

of pleasure until my stomach threatens to rupture

because if I get enough I can suffocate my pain.

 

I create ancient pain paintings along my arms,

scarring my skin like early man scarred cave walls

with blood, telling the story of the hunt for life.

I in script my search on my arms in jagged lines

each detailing the missing link that eludes my grasp

and so I reach down in myself to expose

the ugliness that is trapped within my skin.

I write songs of survival across my growing canvas

silent witness that demand you to listen

but somehow you are blind and cannot see me.

So I continue to write because my mouth is sealed.

 

I struggle, endlessly struggle to find the silver lining.

Forgetting that sunshine can only come from within.

So I cast of my shell, and suddenly I am shining.

Somehow whole, rested and perfect, without sin.

I like Big Books and I cannot Lie – A poem

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I found this gem while going through the reader and simply couldnt resist

Ain't no rest for the wicked - Philip Wardlow

I like big books and I can not lie
You other scholars can’t deny
That when a librarian walks in with an itty bitty waist
and slaps a big paged volume down in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your specs
‚ÄėCause you notice that book looks¬†stuffed
Deep  in the pages the words be blaring.
I’m hooked and I can’t stop staring
Oh baby, I wanna get with you
in my lap to read the big picture
My schoolboys tried to warn me
But that big book makes me so ornery
When I rub its Rump-o’-smooth-skin
spine and I’m not allowed to read it.
Well, use me, use me
‚ÄėCause you ain‚Äôt that average¬†mystery
On the shelves, I’ve seen those other books dancin’
To hell with romances
I¬†‚Äėm tired of magazines
Conveying to me flat books are the thing,
Take the average smart man and ask him that
The book gotta pack much back
So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got your…

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I’m Drowning in Misery and Miracles

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This morning I awoke, hardly refreshed

everything already quickly vanishing

Like having a story just disappear,

I guess dreams aren’t meant to be kept

but treasured like forgotten childhoods.

Still, itchy, it tickled my conscious,

like religion and other touchy subjects.

Little details bubbling to the surface,

the hot greasy meat lovers pizza

a recipe for disaster, grinding teeth

and toothpicks that were useless.

Forgotten firework flashes from faraway,

like trying to remember my first memory

or remembering how you smelled

when I was standing next to you.

The mental maze was without beginning

and I didn’t know where I would end up

so I simply destroyed the question.

Maybe I was being lazy…

Maybe I should have started flipping tables

searching for the answer, for you

and made this a story of my best days.

But the touchy subjects still surface,

and the awesome moments are long gone

I realize, maybe it’s not meant to be

and I just want to sleep forever

and dream of you and the firework show

but thankfully, I am still breathing

even though my heart is sinking

I’m drowning in misery and miracles.

This is a really exciting poem for me! I got this idea from: http://heatherdorn.wordpress.com/2013/11/18/the-legal-limit/

Basically you create a found poem using: http://what-would-i-say.com

It’s a lot of fun and really pushed your creativity to the limits in order to find connections. The bold words or phrases are pulled directly from the created statuses. Please try it out and link them back to me! I would love to read them!